Sister

If someone asked me who were closest to my heart, it would be my younger sister Grace. She's my baby sister, but over the years she's grown quite big and is now even taller than I am. (not bitter, I promise) My mom once told me that the greatest and most valuable gifts she could ever leave the 3 of us with were each other as siblings are the oldest relationships you'll have in your entire life. And I thought about her words, and it's true. (My mom is my role model....she's such a woman of wisdom.) I love my sister so much, but she's not an easy one to love for me. When I was reading the Love Languages novel it was like I was reading and learning all about her and my relationship. I send her emails, long stories, pages about my life in Berkeley...the people in my life, the things God is teaching me, new ways to do QT, study tips, essay edits, ask her to update me on how she's doing, I send postcards and I don't get anything in return. Just a "unny I got your email, thanks" would suffice, but nothing. I call her whenever I get the chance, and she doesn't pick up (she doesn't like to talk on the phone, she doesn't even talk with her boyfriend) but still. In many ways it is discouraging to love my sister, especially when I am away and not physically close. A few times I've told myself I was going to give up on her, but how could I when she's my little sister. I've brought it up to her a few times, and she's admitted to appreciating the little things I do but, it ends there. My sister is really good at giving gifts, big expensive ones and small thoughtful ones. She decided not to eat dinner one night in London so she could get me this one coat...I was the only one she bought anything for from that trip and when I was leaving for Cambodia this past summer she made me a jar of folded stars that you can make at home. And she wrote a bible verse and a few encouraging words on the inside, she made 31 one for each day I was out on the mission field. Her love languages aren't quite the same as mine, but I can see her love for me. And while it does not manifest itself in the emails in my inbox...I know, and understand, that she does care in her very own way.

There are some people who come naturally to love. They are easy to pour into, because they give and receive the exact same way you do. But then there are people like my sister, they are difficult and discouraging to share with, love into. But Jesus didn't limit himself to the people who were easy to love, people who gave back just as much as he did. Who could possibly deserve his abounding love if that were the case? In ministry, there are some people who naturally fit into the arms you spread out. And then...the people who fall off the edges, and can go seemingly unnoticed. Lord - help me to see those people, stretch my arms farther...make my heart deeper.